Remember that time back in 2016 when I said I was calling it a day on this whole blogging deal?
Yeah, well…
I seem to find myself in similar circumstances as I was when I first began my blog, back in 2015. That is, pregnant.
Here in Canada, mamas now have the option of taking a mind-blowing 18 month maternity leave. While the financial implications of this option are not exactly enticing, my husband and I agreed that the numerous benefits of staying home with my kids while they are so little just couldn’t be overlooked.
So now I have a year and a half to be a stay-at-home mama. Going into this mat leave I’m a little bit wiser, a lot more haggard-looking, and considerably more realistic about how that time will and should be spent. I had a good chuckle when I looked back on my (lofty, unrealistic) goals for my first mat leave. Good grief – I had no idea what was coming down the (literal and figurative) pipes! Not to mention, I had no idea how much my world would be rocked by the constant thrum of low-grade anxiety – feelings I was not used to contending with much at all, let alone on such a regular basis.
So with this maternity leave, my goals are much simpler:
- Keep my little people alive.
- Drink a green smoothie every day.
- Move every day for the sake of health and fitness, even if it’s just a walk around the block.
- Connect with at least one person outside of my house every day.
- Write every day (blog, journal, email, or special project I’m working on and will likely be working on for the next 20-50 years of my life).
A much simpler and more realistic list than my first go!
As I toyed with the idea of blogging again, I had to get real about what my intentions were this time. I am not seeking to be ‘an influencer’ – I don’t know enough about any one topic to be taken seriously. Plus I don’t have my own personal photographer to follow me around throughout my days, snapping shots of me in flowy dresses or jeans with rips in just the right places as I play with my children in perfect natural light and sip coffee from my affiliate-linked espresso machine. So there’s that.
After some middle-of-the-night reflecting (thanks to acid reflux, hip discomfort, and a generally busy mind), I settled on two purposes that will drive my blog this time:
- To write about a variety of topics and for different audiences. As an aspiring author, it just makes sense to give myself as many opportunities and outlets to hone my skills as possible. The audience part will be interesting because I’m not on Facebook anymore. I’m not going to ‘push my product’ out to the masses – I’m just going to see who finds me and sticks around.
- To feel connected with people. I’m in the middle of reading Braving the Wilderness by Brene Brown – who, by the way, has an open invitation to dinner at my house any night of the week (Friday is pizza night…just saying). In this book, Brene talks about what is means to feel ‘true belonging’. Maybe it’s because I grew up as a bit of a nomad, or maybe it’s just because I’m human, but I’ve come to know this truth about myself: I have been seeking ‘true belonging’ for a long time. It is always easier for me to choose to be reclusive. It is always less stressful and more safe to just stay home, to not reach out, to not risk judgement. But it is also when I push myself to connect with others that I almost always feel energized. So, if something I write about here tickles your brain or makes you think ‘yes!’ or evokes a reaction or elicits a question…do let me know. I’m interested. For real. Let’s connect.
Thanks for reading. Y’all come back now!
I think that applies to so many of us, K. I know I’ve been searching for my “tribe” of connected souls forever…
xoxox
So true that many of us are looking for those feelings of connection, true belonging, ‘our tribe’. I wonder why it so elusive? Could it be that we are relying too heavily on others to provide us with those feelings, when really the answer lies within?
Kelly, I really enjoy reading your blog posts! They are so real and truthful, and I love it! Congrats on your pregnancy!! 🙂 hopefully we can connect again soon! I miss our hang outs at Yonge & Eg, but it wil also be fun to watch our little kiddos playing together sometime! Best of luck on your mat leave, and hope to see you and catch up soon! 🙂
So lovely to hear from you, Meaghan! Thanks for reading my blog – you’re awesome! We are definitely loooonnnnng overdue for a catch-up. Let’s work something out for the spring or summer 🙂